Hermana

To my sister,

As I rock my second baby girl to sleep, I think about you and our mother. You were just a baby when a drunk driver caused your innocent life to end in a most tragic way. I pray you felt no pain and that God's angels quickly swaddled you up to heaven before you suffered.

I think about how unfair it is that we didn't grow up together or that our mother was robbed the chance to raise you.

You would have been my big sister. We would have loved each other's children, teased each other's husbands and cried on each other's shoulders.

I wish it had been me. I would trade places with you if I could to give you more time with our mom. She is amazing. You made her amazing. You gave her the first taste of true unconditional love with your smiles and coos. Though she lost a daughter that horrible day, I gained an incredible mother. She is the strongest woman I've ever met. She is resilient and fearless. She continues to reinvent herself and push the envelope in influential ways. Her love knows no boundaries. Throughout my childhood she always put me first and gave me opportunities she never had despite the trials of being a single mom and the tragedy of losing you.

Your death was not in vain. It has showed me that a mother's love can go on. It has taught me that even in the face of unimaginable loss, we can choose to be a victim or a warrior. Our mother chooses warrior every day that she lives without you.

So thank you sister. Though I never met you, I truly love you. See you soon, but hopefully not too soon.